Yum, Pie

Remember those blueberries??? Well I made pie. I can't wait to taste it. It's so beautiful on the outside, I just hope the inside doesn't disappoint!

I realized something about myself today. I am quite sure this won't be news to any of you, but it has taken me this long to pin point the actual root of this particular flaw. I am vain. Ron said something today that at first I thought was ignorant and untrue, but it's just marinading in my head and darn it...he's right. I was complaining about the thing I ALWAYS complain about...my weight. I swear he is a saint because he has been listening to this since Reagan was born. I won't lie it has been a struggle for me and just so frustrating that I can't seem to get it under control. Anyway what he said was, " It's a shame that you are going to waste the prime of your life being consumed with this issue." Wow. OK. So as I have been thinking about that statement all day...actually weighing it to see if there is truth in it... and i came up with Vanity. For some reason I seem to think other people care what I look like! Ha. Like I have always told my daughter, "have confidence everyone else is so busy thinking about themselves they aren't noticing what you are insecure about!" Well duh, nice that I have taken my own advice. If I am trying to be healthy and slim for me and because it makes me feel good, then GREAT, but if I am doing it for the praise and attention of those around me then YIKES! Not great. I don't know how this will all play out, but I have a feeling that once I deal with this issue of vanity and might as well call out pride too, then I think I will finally have success. While I figure out how God wants to deal with this, I will continue to work on the outside, doing what I know to do, but I will be changing my focus to my inside. The last thing I want to be is a stereo-typical cheerleader...beautiful on the outside, empty and ugly on the inside. Please don't send me hate mail, I know that is NOT what all cheerleaders are like, I am just going for the imagery here. We've all seen beautiful women of zero substance or heaven forbid just down right mean. Anyway I can't wait to see what happens when I get out of my own way.

BTW. I took a break and tasted the pie...Delish!!! Maybe there is hope for me too!! LOL