Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Evening Alone

I found this in my drafts and thought I would share it...I think it is from september or october!

Some how last night all the planets alligend and for the first time in 13 years I was in my own home all alone. Ron and Ryan were camping with the cub scouts, two life saving friends each took one of the girls so I could go to school and decided to just have them stay the night. So I came home from school to an empty house and woke up to the same thing. What an amazing break! I am weirdly refreshed even though it was just a few hours. However, because I am me, I did some reflection.

Last night I walked through the house and saw a mess. Evidence that children live here and a crazy week had been accomplished. This morning as I get ready to pick up my kids (2 of them anyway) I stood in the upstairs hall, which gives me a small view into each bedroom. I am overwhelmed with thankfulness as I see the preteen room filled with items that suggest someone is growing up and starting to behave that way. In the other girl's bedroom, I see someone who is trying very hard to learn to juggle all the responsibilites of life including keeping her room up. Little piles of "treasures" here and there and all things important to a 9 year old. As I glanced into Ryan's room I see his bow an arrow set on the floor and a few super hero masks peaking out of the closet and I realize how quickly that phase will pass. Just looking at these things filled me with happiness though. Joy that my home is typically filled with laughter and even bickering filled me up, as I am blessed with the sounds of children in my home. God has certainly blessed my life and as I took inventory, I realize all too soon the halls and rooms will be perfectly clean and silent. The kids will grow and move on to their own lives and it will just be us. As wonderful as that phase of life will be with my best friend, I'm glad it's not here yet.

What is it about the night?

I studied for about 12 hours today, but I wanted to get this written before I forgot so hopefully it will turn out right.

Ron made a comment a few weeks back about how usually when someone talks about the night time it is in a negative way. Things are scary at night or in movies bad things happen in the dark. Usually our minds head right to the negative when it comes to anything about the night. However, he pointed out, there is one exception...the night Christ was born...Christmas night. When we hear that we think of the songs like "Silent Night" which has words like "holy, calm, and even bright" in it. When we think about that night we think about joy and anticipation. Quite a contrast from the other ideas about the night!

Well because I am me, I had to let that thought marinade in my head for a few days as it was surprising deep as my husband put it! As I pondered this thought, I began to realize that maybe there was a bigger meaning than just a star would shine brightest if Jesus was born at night. What if it was to show us that good things can happen in the night? That in the darkest times of our lives, if we will have the anticipation that Jesus is going to show up in our "night" and bring something new to us, maybe the night wouldn't be so bad. Maybe He wanted us to know that our perspective should not be one of dread when we walk through dark times, but of hope and excitement and anticipation of the promise that He gives that He will come to us in that place and never leave.

I read a portion of a bible verse today and it said something like..."He quiets me with His love." In this season of wrapping up a term in school, with Christmas right on its heels, it did me some good to rest a minute in His love and let my soul become quiet for even just a minute. In our "night" experiences God so wants to come and not only quiet us with His love, but to turn that night into something unforgettable, life changing and eternal! Much like He did on the night He was born!! Christmas is fast approaching, my hope is that we all stop and really remember why we celebrate for truly that night began the greatest love story ever written and I am so thankful to be apart of it!